Yesterday after a very long day of work i came home to hurry up and drive fifty miles to a honda dealership to pick up a car part for my A/C. Needless to say my brother, who thank God is a mechanic, says it's an electrical problem so the poor guy is gonna take my dash out and look for it. best brother of life. i tell you.

anyway i came home to heart breaking news; my 83 year old grandfather who made it 2 years past his life expectancy [he has terminal esophageal and stomach cancer, which has spread through pretty much his entire body] ..well he's in his final days...hospice is now at the home every day; he's receiving liquid morphine by mouth. he can barely talk, breath, or move. I hugged him last night and felt every vertebra in his back. he is so frail...it breaks my heart completely.

He is the man that made my father and my family what it is; my father would not be who he is without pops. And in correlation i wouldn't be who i am. He taught my dad to be the strongest man i've ever met, more caring and giving and honest, with an unshakable faith in God. He has been dirt poor all of his life, working in cotton field, orange groves, etc...he made literally coins a day and supported eight children, all of which are extraordinary people. they all inherited his qualities. the Earth will truly be a little worse off when he's gone.
He was married to his wife for almost seventy years. He tells her she's beautiful and that he loves her, every morning...even though she no longer really knows who anyone is. Watching them both deteriorate over the last couple of years has been heart wrenching...but some how him not being here at all just is kind of unbearable.

if you stumble across my page please say a small prayer for my family, i realize you have no idea who i am...and you have no reason to pray..but if you could i would sincerely appreciate it from the bottom of my heart.

xoxoxox,
Deezy.